Choosing whom to be friends with is in our hands, but choosing family members is not. The real problem is when they become toxic because dealing with them or avoiding them won’t be easy.
The following article talks about relationships with your family members and relatives, what distinguishes them as toxic, and signs of toxicity, when it’s time to keep your distance, how to keep your space, and cut them off when necessary.
When To Know If A Person Is Toxic?
1) if the person is physically abusive, many households see a physically abusive person, either short-tempered or alcoholic, or both.
2) if the person is sexually abusive, sexual abuse is a crime, but we somehow tend not to see it as a crime when this happens in a family or marriage.
3) If the person is mentally abusive, many of us don’t see mental abuse as offensive in the first place, but the fact is mental abuse is as severe as physical or sexual abuse.
4) emotional abuse: just like mental abuse, emotional abuse is not considered abuse in the first place, but it is as severe as mental abuse, rather more powerful.
Why Is It Necessary To Keep A Distance From The Toxic Relatives?
The people we grow up with or are around most of the time affect us a lot; they may affect our price of mind, behavior, nature, and many other factors.
For example, if there are kids at your home, then being around that toxic person, your kids might pick up some undesirable traits from them. They might teach them some bad things, and so on, and hence it’s necessary to keep you, kids, away from any person who is in any way toxic.
1) if a person is physically abusive, other than physical harm caused, you might turn the same but not in every case. If there are kids at home, they might turn out to be the same in the future since physical abuse affects a person mentally, so it may degrade your mental health, turning you or others short-tempered.
2) if a person is sexually abusive: sexual abuse trauma stays with a person for life, haunting them and affecting every other relationship, and it’s not easy to get over this trauma even with the help of therapy.
3) if a person is mentally or emotionally abusive, they might affect your peace of mind in a wrong way; you get so mentally or emotionally broken that it’s like living in hell, and many of us may have experienced it because these two are more common than physical and sexual abuse.
Hence with all these consequences with all these l different types of abuse, it becomes essential that we keep our distance or cut them off from our lives.
So How Do We Deal With These Toxic Relatives?
1) physical abuse: if it’s a very close person like a father, mother, or siblings and cutting them off from your life is difficult, then you can try talking them into therapy for anger management, mental health therapy, etc. in case the person is alcoholic then consult a professional on how to treat them, and even though after applying all these measures there is no solution then the only option left is to cut all the ties with them, you can go through legal options as well if it’s a rough process.
2) sexual abuse: in this scenario, you have to address the issue legally; sexual abuse is a severe crime and needs to be dealt with legally.
3) Mental or emotional abuse: in these cases, it’s recommended that you see a therapist first; therapy will help you not to get affected by the same. Secondly, you need to talk to the person abusing. In few cases, they might not be intentionally doing it, so you need to understand what damage they are doing and deliberately do the same. You cut them off straightforwardly. In the case of distant relatives, it might be easy. Still, a close relative would be difficult, but it’s the last option left, and you tondo it for your good.
Other than these, you might have some distant relatives who might be mentally or emotionally abusive. They may talk behind your back, taunt, etc., but these can be dealt with quickly. Try keeping as little contact with them as possible; you can be harsh to them about it and warn them at once and draw a line, and if they continue the same, there is no harm in cutting them off.
Any abuse should not be tolerated, or else you encourage that act, stand firm and draw a line when and where needed.